We all know that one person who won't...
Me: Haha! Yeah! F*ck those guys.
Also me: (quietly deletes a bunch of tweets railing against Costco for putting Christmas stuff out a month ago).
In these tales, it’s always uncles who say fucked up shit. In my family, they’re called brothers. All three voted for the orangey insurrectionist rapist in chief. Pass the stuffing 🤦🏼♀️
This line though: "They find themselves walking into a Rite Aid and descending into some Cornholio-style rant about Reese’s cups shaped like Christmas trees"
I won't decorate for Christmas until after Thanksgiving. We barely decorate for Halloween (just do it for the kids). And I just can't get behind my neighbors who bother with inflatable turkeys on their lawns during the short jaunt between Hallow's Eve and Christ's Mas. Seems like a waste of good air to me.
Great article! It had my laughing out loud. The soggy bread getting shoved up the turkey’s ass was my favorite observation lol 😂
all the best this Q4 📈
So you're saying it's okay to cryogenically thaw Mariah Carey each year as early as August?