Why Taylor Swift is a Feminist Icon
This post contains lethal doses of sarcasm if read irresponsibly.
This blithe dismissal of a common slight against the feminine laughter is yet another slanderous attack against the very real trauma faced by womyn under the capitalist patriarchy. The teachings of Critical Swift Theory (CST), as practiced by those colloquially known as “Swifties,” translate the teachings of third-wave feminist icon, Taylor Swift, into pithy and concise insights into daily misogynistic microaggressions. After thorough cultural analysis, the theoretical framework of CST channels pain into calls to action that will work to alleviate the stark gender disparities and inequities that persist in a society monitored by the male gaze.
“No one likes a mad woman,” Swift bellows on the widely acclaimed Folklore. “You made her like that.” The “you,” in this instance, refers to gender spheres imposed by (white) men for the benefit of (white) men onto womyn. This expected conformity is a burden disproportionately shared amongst Swifties as they channel the music and potent radical lyricism of Taylor Swift to shatter the glass ceiling. “Chuckling” as they do so, they are lectured by manspreading mansplaining dickweasles that womyn are the mad ones because they dare to subvert whatever roles are foisted upon them by the kinds of social conventions that enable so many men to commit 1989 erasure.
But the Swifties will persist, mind you, as they will belt, “I’ve been Miss Misery for the last time.” Men will dismiss this proclamation as the trite ramblings of a Twitter White Feminist, but these sexist pigs have been warned. An army of empowered womyn will rise up, take charge, and ensure everyone will love to see a #girlboss winning.
Then, the Swifties will have the last laugh.