The World Is Literally On Fire. Here's Why This is a Good Thing.
This post contains lethal doses of sarcasm if read irresponsibly.
Between myself and Jeff Bezos, we have an average net worth of $75 billion.
The world is getting richer, our lives are more prosperous.
You can hail an Uber from your phone.
You can order food from your phone.
You can ship a roll of Obama toilet paper to your doorstep from your phone.
You can find one-night stands from your phone.
You can use a GPS from your phone.
You can answer work emails from your phone.
You can book flights from your phone.
You can binge Netflix from your phone.
You can stream music from your phone.
You can troll feminists from your phone.
You can troll MAGA chuds from your phone.
You can read whatever news that confirms what you already think from your phone.
You can look up “Guinness world record for longest fingernails” from your phone.
You can buy a new iPhone from your phone.
Now, you can watch the world burn from your phone.
