Hey! We're Going to a Santa Bar Crawl...
It'll definitely be one of the times this holiday season.
“The Santa Bar Crawl is this weekend! Do you want to go?”
“Sure! That sounds like fun. So can we just show up?”
“No. We need to buy tickets and buy a Santa hat.”
“Alright. Are the tickets cheap?”
“No. They’re $100 each.”
“Does the ticket cost at least include a drink at any of the bars?”
“No.”
“Fine. Does that mean we can skip the lines and walk right into the bar?”
“No. Unfortunately every bar on the list will have lines.”
“That makes sense. They’re selling a lot of tickets. Hopefully, it’s not a long wait to get into the bars.”
“No. It’s pretty much amusement park waits everywhere.”
“Since everyone is moving to different places, at least the bars won’t be insanely crowded so it’s almost impossible to order a drink.”
“No. Last year, it took me 40 minutes every time I wanted a gin and tonic.”
“Well, when we finally get a drink, will there be enough time for us to chill and hang out at the bar before we have to leave for the next one?”
“No. It’s usually one hour per bar.”
“Do the bouncers even check the tickets at the door of each bar?”
“No.”
“These tickets sound like a scam. Is there anything stopping us from going to one of the bars on the list and staying there the whole time?”
“No. We could do that, but everyone will be going to other bars, so it makes sense to go where the crowd is. It’s a bar crawl, just embrace it.”
“Will this bar crawl be remotely fun?”
“Maybe? This girl I’m trying to smash will be there. Can you just wingman?”
“Uh, sure… Fuck it. Let’s go.”
The bars are also like in different parts of town, so we’ll have to drive.